It was 8th grade. I dont think we really understood the concept of falling for someone. It was that time i decided you weren’t the one for me. I always kept the idea of you in the back of my head, i always kept the idea of falling for you with me. Its now our senior year, i’ve cared about you for five years now. The song you sang to me came on. Ever since you sang it to me i’ve always had it on every playlist, on every mixed cd. You never pushed me into anything, and you’ve always waited. For everytime i’ve pushed you away, i’m sorry. i regret it. you fell in love last year, that sucked. i was so hurt, i thought you gave up on me. i should’ve known you would never give up. i wish this story had a happy ending. you fell in love, and i started talking to your friend. my feelings for him were in no way comparable to anything i felt for you. i talked to him when i was lost, i needed someones guidance and help. i messed up that friendship, just like ours is messed up. this year when you told me you liked me, it was november 15. i was talking to someone, but like everytime we say “i like you” my heart melted. i was wearing a red shirt. i waited for you from the day i was wearing my red shirt until the day i was wearing my blazer. expectations never met reality. i always thought we’d be more and have this wonderful story to tell about how we ended up together, actually everyone thought we’d end up together. i heard you were talking to someone, you fought so hard for my trust & that fight is what made me fall even harder. i was falling, and you knew you would never be the one to catch me. after i heard about the other girl, i just fought for you i wanted everything to be perfect. i started partying again, in a way i started losing myself all over. i needed you there more than ever, you were. just not the way i needed you to be. i had sex with my ex on one of those nights, the guilt ate at me. i talked to you about it, i told you that you were pushing me away. i told you i didnt have sex with him, i lied. you said you wanted to talk about how i felt, you never cared. your birthday came, i came up with the cutest idea…i thought i could win you back. i was wrong. the night i wore my blazer, you admitted that you led me on. i talked to your friend, he told me he never knew we talked. you hid it, your whole plan came out. have me, her, & the other. i knew you for so long and never would have thought anything would come to this. i wore a skirt & cardigan the day after the blazer, well i made out with one of your friends, the one you never let know that we talked. i hope his ex never finds out. the day you told me “you’re one of my best friends, i would never hurt you” is on repeat. the other day i found out you were going to prom with her, i think its the day i saw you hold her hand. i thought you said you didnt want anything like that? just so you know we will never be ok after that one.